“Maggie, stop!”
Beth shouted, trying to
prevent her sister from kicking Rick in the stomach-again. She shoved her
sister back and planted herself between her sister and boyfriend.
“What the hell?”
That was Daryl’s voice, as
though things couldn’t get any worse. He yanked the curtain back, took one look
at Beth and Rick in the nude and turned right back around.
“Daryl!” Maggie shouted, when
she saw he was leaving.
“Huh-uh,” he said,
steadfastly keeping his back turned.
“Do something!”
“What the fuck you expect me
to do?”
Maggie was at a loss for
words as Rick struggled to his feet. He and Beth quickly dressed while Maggie
glared at the two of them.
“How could you?” she asked
Rick. “She’s just a kid!”
“Rick isn’t the problem here
Maggie. You are,” Beth said cooly.
“How am I the problem?”
Beth scooped the teddy bear
off the floor and pressed it to Maggie’s chest.
“I’m not just a kid.”
“Yeah? You think you’re all
grown up? We’ll see what Daddy says about this. We’ll call the council on you,
Rick! You sick pervert!”
“Hershel knows. He gave us
his blessing,” Rick told her.
It was obvious Maggie didn’t
believe him for a second.
“He does, Maggie. Go on, get
him. He’ll tell you.”
Maggie took Beth by the hand,
her grip tight as a vice, inescapable, and dragged her toward their father’s
cell in another part of the block. He was putting Judith down to sleep when
Maggie burst in.
“You’ll never guess what I
just walked in on!”
“Shush! You’ll wake the
baby.”
He pushed Maggie into the
corridor and Beth wrested herself from her sisters grip.
“Come with me.”
His tone brooked no argument
so Maggie and Beth followed. When they reached the council room he closed the
door.
“Go on, tell him. Or I will.”
“Maggie caught me with Rick
in an…intimate moment.”
“I see.”
His calm tone and lack of
surprise was a shock to Maggie. Beth and Rick had been telling the truth. He
knew.
“You really do know? You actually gave them your
blessing?”
“You didn’t complain when I
gave you and Glenn my blessing.”
“That’s different! I’m a
grown woman and Beth’s—”
“So am I,” Beth interjected.
“You are not. You’re a kid.
You’re my baby sister. Daddy, how could
you?”
“Maggie, I could go into a
longwinded explanation about how this world forced people to grow up fast and
that Beth doesn’t have the same kind of time to experience things in this life
that you had before the turn. I could tell you how there isn’t much of a
difference between Beth and Rick and my own history with your mama, Jo. I won’t
do that. You know these things already. I will say that I’ve thought about it
long and hard and I approve of the match. I don’t have a problem with Rick and
Beth falling in love and being together. Now, if you do, you’re going to have
to work that out on your own. All I want from you is to keep an open mind and
keep your mouth shut, especially around Carl.”
“You don’t want him to know
his daddy is a pedophile? Fine, I won’t tell him.”
“That’s enough! I’m not a
child, Maggie!” Beth shouted, angrier than she’d ever been with her sister. “Do
me a favor and butt out of my life!”
Beth stormed away but Maggie
chased after her. “Oh, that’s really mature, running away.”
“Just like it was mature for
you to attack him?” Beth shot back. She stopped and faced Maggie. “You keep
your mouth shut. Word has a way of spreading and I don’t want this getting back
to Carl. He’s not ready to know. You can hate Rick all you want but don’t you
dare do a thing—”
Maggie snorted derisively.
Beth had never seen her sister so hostile, so nasty and mean. “You think he’s
ever gonna call you Mommy? For God’s sake, he tried to date you once!”
Beth backed away, shaking her
head. “Go cool off, Maggie. Until you apologize to Rick I don’t want anything
to do with you.”
“That’ll be a cold day in
hell.”
Beth stormed away, leaving
her seething sister in the corridor, watching her stalk back to her cell. Daryl
was talking to Rick. He looked very uncomfortable in her presence and Beth
suspected it had to do with seeing her in the buff.
“So you saw me naked. It’s
not the end of the world, Daryl,” Beth snapped.
“I gotta go,” he answered,
and hurried off toward his own cell.
“I’ll bet the whole damn
prison knows now with all the ruckus Maggie caused,” Beth said miserably,
sitting down on her bunk.
“I don’t know. I hope not.
Nobody else came around,” Rick said. He took her hand in his and then realized
she was crying.
“Are you okay?” she asked
wetly.
“Yeah. Are you?”
“Maggie was just awful. I
can’t believe she punched and kicked you.”
Rick found himself smiling,
despite his injuries, which were fairly minor. He’d had worse. “She was
defending her sister.”
“I’m furious with her.”
“Don’t be. This came as a
shock to her.”
“How can you be so
forgiving?”
Rick shrugged. “I’d have done
the same if I had a little sister and caught her in bed with the group leader.”
“You’d have treated her like
a child? Humiliated her? Beaten her lover?”
Her lover.
That brought a smile to
Rick’s lips.
“Probably, but I would have
felt really bad about it after. She’ll either accept us together or she won’t.
We can’t force her, Beth. Come on. It’s late. Let’s lie down.”
“Lock the door this time,”
she said. “We don’t need any more surprise guests.”
When he came back to bed he
kissed her softly on the side of her head and held her close. With him behind
her, she felt much better, but she was still worried.
“You won’t put an end to us
because of her, will you?”
“No,” he said.
“I love you.”
He kissed her softly again.
“I love you, too.”
…
The next couple of
weeks were tense.
Maggie was civil when Carl was around but she turned cold as ice when he wasn’t
there. Carl wasn’t stupid. He knew something was going on.
“Hershel?”
“Carl, come in,” the older
man said, when Carl came to his cell to drop Judith off. “What can I do for
you?”
“I need to talk but I don’t
want to talk to Dad because it’s about him.”
“I see. Well, tell me what’s
on your mind, son.”
Carl took a moment to gather
his thoughts. He had a lot of information he’d gleaned from observing everyone
but he couldn’t put it together.
“Do you think Dad may have a
girlfriend?”
“What makes you think he does?”
“He seems different. Kind of
happy.”
“Does that bother you?” asked
Hershel.
“No, it’s good he’s happy
but…but…”
“Your mom hasn’t been gone
that long.”
Carl nodded. “They hated each
other at the end. They weren’t happy, I know that but I don’t know. It’s weird.
I don’t like the idea that he’s forgotten Mom that fast.”
“Carl, as a man who has been
married, divorced, and widowed twice, I can tell you without any doubt
whatsoever that Rick has not forgotten Lori. A man never forgets a wife,
whether he’s had only one or if he’s had five.”
“Then how could he date
someone else so soon if he still loves Mom?”
“I still love my first wife,
Jo. I loved her when we divorced. I loved her even after she died in that car
accident. I’ll love her to my dying breath.”
“You can really love two
women?” he said, looking confused and sad. Hershel’s heart went out to the boy.
He knew it must have been really hard for him to understand what was happening,
even if he didn’t know the identity of the woman his father was with now.
“Yes, absolutely. I know this
is hard for you to understand but your mom and dad didn’t hate each other. They
loved each other very much. That’s why Rick struggled so hard with her death.
That kind of love runs deep and it lasts a lifetime. No matter who your father
falls in love with he’s always, always going to love Lori. He’s got enough room
in his heart for her and he has room in his heart for someone new. Never doubt
that he loves you and Judith, too. The capacity of the human heart to love is
endless. I know this from firsthand experience. Doesn’t make it easier to
accept your dad with someone new, I know, but in time, as you mature and grow,
you’ll understand that.”
Carl nodded but he still
looked deeply unhappy. “I wonder who she is.”
“You’ll know that when he’s
ready for you to know. Give him time to tell you. When he’s ready, he will.
Carl, it’s okay if you’re angry about it. It’s okay to be unhappy for awhile.
You don’t have to be happy but you will have to accept it. It wouldn’t be fair
for you to expect your father to go the rest of his life alone, lonely,
especially with the way this world is. Your dad can sometimes seem superhuman
but let me assure you, he’s just a man, same as me, same as Daryl, or Glenn, or
anyone else. He has feelings, too, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t love your
mom, or will forget her, or put anyone else above you and Judith. I know he’d never do that.”
He left Hershel’s cell and
the older man watched him go, hoping his words would bring the boy some comfort.
…
When Maggie showed
no signs of
relenting or coming around to the idea of her sister and Rick as a couple, Rick
decided to take a step toward bridging the gap. Glenn hadn’t liked it at first,
probably still didn’t, but he’d accepted that there was nothing he could do to
change it, Rick and Beth had Hershel’s blessing, and at the end of the day it
just wasn’t any of his business.
He climbed the guard tower
and closed the trap door before going to stand beside Maggie, who leaned
against the railing, keeping an eye out for danger.
“I’ve said what I have to say
to you, Rick.”
“I haven’t said what I have
to say.”
“Then say it and go.”
“I love her.”
Maggie’s smile was one of
bitterness tinged with disgust. She shook her head and looked at him. “You love
her? Really?”
“Yeah.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know.”
“I do. You’re crazy. You lost
your mind when you lost Lori. You lost your moral center.”
“I’m the same man I always
was.”
“Are you, Rick?”
“I guess if I’m an amoral
pedophile then your father must be, too.”
This time he was ready for
the right hook. This time he wouldn’t simply take an ass kicking. He blocked
the blow and shoved her away from him with as much force as he dared. Enough to
let her know he wasn’t playing around.
“Who the hell do you think
you are?”
“Hershel was thirty-eight
when your mother fell in love with him at sixteen. I’m thirty-six and Beth is
eighteen. They waited until she was eighteen then married. Is Hershel rotten at
his core? Is he a pedophile?”
Maggie crossed her arms and
leaned back against the glass of the guard tower. Of course she didn’t see her
father as a pedophile. He was the best man she knew. Rick and Beth weren’t
doing anything her own parents hadn’t done. The two men weren’t all that
different.
“Are you sure this is about
the age difference or something else?” Rick asked.
“I don’t know what you mean.”
“I mean you don’t want Beth
to grow up. You want her to stay forever young and innocent in your eyes?”
She couldn’t exactly argue
that. She couldn’t even bring herself to meet Rick’s gaze. She just stared out
at the prison yard.
“If you really think I’m an
indecent man, a pervert, then I’m sorry. I’m none of those things, Maggie. I’m
just a man who fell in love. I can’t help that the first person my heart opened
up to was Beth. She accepted me. She loves me. I love her. We’re going to be
together. I’d just really like it if we could go back to being friends,
trusting one another. I promise you one thing. I will always do everything in
my power to keep her safe. I’ll treat her right. I’ll never hurt her. That’s
all I’ve got and if it’s not good enough for you, I’m sorry.”
Rick left Maggie alone with
her thoughts and descended to the ground. She watched him cross the yard,
heading for his crops, a jumble of thoughts and feelings going through her mind
and heart.
…
That night, after
dropping Judith off
with Rick, Beth took a
shower and then returned to her cell, exhausted. She’d not only been
babysitting all day but she’d manned the grill and washed clothes and helped
clean out some of the offices in the administration wing to make room for
supplies brought in from Daryl and Michonne’s runs. There were new people
coming in, including someone with medical experience named Bob Stookey.
Beth almost didn’t notice the
letter lying on her desk. She picked it up, feeling it had weight, and opened
it. Inside was a note from Maggie … and three condoms.
I reckon you could do a
lot
worse than Rick Grimes. Be
careful. I have more when you
need them.
worse than Rick Grimes. Be
careful. I have more when you
need them.
Maggie xoxo
Beth smiled. That was as
close to an apology as Maggie was going to get and Beth could accept it. Still,
she wanted to know that her sister had worked things out with Rick. She wasn’t
okay with her treatment of him.
“Guess who shook my hand
today?”
“Where’s Judy?”
“With Carl.”
Beth was still toweling her
hair when she looked up at Rick, who stood in the doorway of the cell, smiling
at her.
“Who shook your hand?”
“Maggie.”
“Without trying to trick you
into losing your balance so she could stomp you into the ground?” she said with
mock surprise.
Rick was grinning when he sat
next to her. “Silently and stiffly but she shook it. She and I talked this
morning.”
“She’s accepted it,” Beth
said, holding up one of the condoms. Rick regarded it before looking at her.
“Want to use one?” she asked,
smiling playfully.
There was nothing playful
about Rick putting his hand on her inner thigh. “Yeah,” he said.
“Come here,” Beth answered,
pulling him into a kiss.
She was always amazed by how
quickly her body responded to him. He could make her heart race and her pussy
moisten with nothing but a glance. They began yanking off their clothes and
before long she was lying under him, naked, while he trailed kisses down her
body. He’d been thirsting for her since her birthday but he hadn’t indulged
again until now.
Beth’s body was humming with
need by the time she felt the first finger slip in. It was pleasant but it only
made her body ache for more. His lips were on hers again when he added a second
finger and went deeper until there was a sharp pain. She hissed and he stopped,
withdrawing his fingers and situating himself above her. She felt the head of
his cock teasing pressure against her clit. Sweet pulses of desire replaced any
discomfort left by his fingers.
“It’s okay. I know it’ll
hurt,” she whispered. “I still want this.”
After rolling on one of the
condoms Rick slowly, very slowly, began to push into her, filling her,
stretching her in ways she’d never imagined, and it did hurt. He was gentle, he
was slow, and even though the pain persisted Beth wouldn’t have traded it for
the world. She was finally as close to Rick as it was possible for her to be
and the love she had for him made her heart swell almost painfully…
“Tell me,” she whispered, as
she felt him reach his climax.
“I love you…”
…
Beth was sore in
the morning.
She also wasn’t alone. Normally Rick waited until she fell asleep before going
back to his cell but this time he’d stayed. It was still dark out when she
awoke in his arms to find him already up, watching her. He smiled and kissed
her brow.
“Morning.”
“Morning,” she said, and ran
her fingers through the hairs of his chest.
“You okay?”
“Better than ever. I’ve never
been this happy. I didn’t think it was possible.”
“I haven’t felt this complete
in a long time,” he confessed.
After a few moments of silence,
holding one another, enjoying the feel of waking up together, Rick had to get
up.
“I need to be in my cell when
Carl gets up,” he said.
Beth nodded. “Have you
thougth about telling him?”
“I have but it isn’t time. He
already suspects I’m seeing someone. He’s not okay with it yet but I think he’s
coming around to the idea.”
“Does he have a clue it’s
me?”
“I don’t think so.”
He kissed her again and then
got up to get dressed. When he was gone Beth also got up, deciding to start her
day early. She needed a shower and wash her sheets. There was blood in them,
blood sticking her thighs together, and she hurt, but it was fading. She smiled
as she imagined being able to make love with Rick without pain and hoped that
time would come soon.
…
There was something
wrong with the pigs.
Violet, as Carl called her, no longer attempted to get up. Rick watched her
sleeping at the back of the pen and wondered what was going on. He had this
depressing feeling that something terrible was on the horizon. That feeling was
only made worse by the presence of so many walkers lining the fences. It was
like the outside world had decided they’d enjoyed enough safety and security
and was determined to destroy what they had.
He hoped he was wrong but
experience had taught Rick that when it came to the worst that could happen he
was always right.
…
Once Beth finished
with her sword
fighting lessons with Michonne for the day she sheathed the blade. Rick was
approaching and he had a look on his face that said he was there for her, not
Michonne.
“I saw your form while you
practiced,” he said. He looked at Michonne. “You think she’s ready to put her
skills to real world use?”
“I think she could handle
herself against one or two. I wouldn’t recommend her trying to take on more
than that yet,” she answered.
“Want to join me? I’m going
to check the traps. You can act as my bodyguard.”
“I’ll bet,” Michonne smirked,
and then started for the prison. She was one of the few who didn’t look angry,
confused, or disgusted by the fact that Rick and Beth were together. Daryl and
Hershel were the other two.
Beth walked with Rick through
the gate, waving at Glenn who was on guard duty. Her brother-in-law waved back
before looking away. He seemed to have a difficult time looking at her when she
was with Rick. That bothered her. When would he, and Maggie for that matter,
accept the choices she and Rick had made? When would they stop judging?
The walk into the woods was a
peaceful one. It was a hot, bright day but in the trees it was noticeably
cooler, pleasant even, with the shade casting the ground in shadows. Once they
were out of the line of sight of the prison Rick took Beth’s hand, lacing his
fingers with hers, and they walked on in comfortable silence.
“Did you really want to check
the traps or is this a date?” she asked after awhile.
“I want to check the traps
but I don’t think there’s going to be anything good. I mostly want to spend
some time with you away from prying eyes and ears.”
“Walker,” Beth said sighing.
“Want to test out your
skills?”
“Absolutely.”
She drew the machete and
approached the walker that was coming toward her. It was a large male and she
took up a battle stance. She swung—and missed.
“Shit,” she said, having used
the blade too soon. She backed up a step and tried again. This time she cut its
head in half. It dropped disgustingly to the ground.
“Yes,” she said, and turned.
Her joy turned to alarm when she saw a walker was coming close to Rick.
“Behind you!”
He turned just in time. He’d
already had his knife out, in case Beth needed assistance. He used it to take
down the gaunt, rotted woman who’d reached for him.
“Beth,” Rick said, hearing
approaching footsteps.
“I see them.”
There were four walkers
approaching. Beth and Rick stood with their backs to the other, waiting for the
things to get close. She used the moves Michonne had taught her and ran the
first of the two walkers coming her way. The second she took out by driving the
machete down into its skull and pulling back.
When it was over Beth wiped
her machete and stood to face Rick.
“You handled yourself
beautifully,” he commented with pride.
“I feel like Xena.”
Rick laughed and took her
hand, leading her deeper into the woods, near the traps.
“Lori loved that show. One
Halloween she came into the bedroom dressed like her and…” his voice trailed
off. “Sorry.”
“It’s okay to talk about her,
Rick,” Beth replied softly. “I’m not that insecure.”
“Yeah, but I’d rather not.
Especially a story like that.”
She squeezed his hand and
came to a stop.
“Something wrong?” he asked.
“My blood’s pumping from the
fight,” she said.
Rick allowed his eyes to
deliberately travel from her luscious lips to her booted feet and back up
again. “That so?” he asked, moving to rest his hands on her hips.
She nodded and looked up at
him. There wasn’t a huge height difference between them. She liked that. He was
backing her toward a tree. She liked that too. She liked the way he started to
kiss her, rough and fast, and deep. She enjoyed the way his hands kneaded her
ass and she enjoyed how he felt pressed against her when her back came into
contact with the tree.
“Turn around,” he said, and
Beth happily obliged while Rick’s hands deftly unfastened her jeans and slipped
into her panties.
A strangled sigh escaped from
Beth when he played his fingers over her slit, teasing her, making her wet.
He’d push the tips of a couple of fingers in, just enough to make her body ache
for penetration, and then slip out again to come to her clit. She bit her lip,
trying to keep quiet. Last thing she wanted was for more walkers to come their
way to interrupt. It seemed to her she always had to be quiet. When they were
at the prison they had to keep it hush-hush.
“Don’t hold back. We’ll be
all right. I think we got all the walkers in the area,” he said, sensing her
efforts to remain as quiet as possible. “Enjoy this the way you want.”
She let out the breath she
hadn’t been aware she was holding. She became so caught up in the sensations of
Rick’s hand between her thighs nothing else mattered. It was a welcome respite
from the dangers and the stress of her life.
When she was ready for him,
when she was begging him, he removed the condom he’d brought from his wallet
and rolled it on. Then he positioned himself at her entrance and slid slowly,
gently in. She wasn’t as tight this time. There was no hint of pain this time.
She even pushed back against him, trying to take him in faster than he
expected.
A long, low moan came from
deep within Beth as she took him in. Rick closed his eyes and remained still
for a moment. She was gloriously tight and so wet. She moved first, and he took
the hint, moving within her slowly at first but picking up pace whenever he
felt her adjust to the movement—to him.
There was no pain this time.
Their first time, a few days ago, had hurt like a sonofabitch. This time Beth
felt only mild discomfort at the start. Now that she’d adjusted she leaned
against the tree feeling sweat bead on her skin, one of Rick’s fingers massing
her clit while the other toyed with her nipples under her shit.
“Fuck, Beth,” he whispered.
There was something deeply
erotic about having him move inside her, the feel of Rick’s breath on her neck,
and the feel of his hands on her body. The sounds he made turned her on. His
breath came fast and short as he pumped into her, occasionally accentuated with
a moan or a whimper of need.
This wasn’t Beth’s first time
coming but it was the best so far. She orgasmed powerfully, clenching his cock
deep inside, her juices exploded from her, gushing over his balls and running
down her thighs as she screamed his name.
…
They enjoyed a
swim in a sunny creek and then lay on the shore
naked, drying off in the sun, talking and cuddling. There came a moment when
Beth wanted to fall asleep but she knew that would be dangerous, so she kept
talking to keep herself and Rick awake.
“What did you say was wrong
with the pigs?”
“I don’t know,” Rick said,
pulling his clothes on. “They’ve come down with something and they’re only
getting worse.”
When they were both dressed
they took the sack that carried a fairly decent haul of fat rabbits and
squirrels and started for home. They passed a dog that had seen better days.
It’s matted fur was an infested mess and it collapsed near the walkers he and
Beth had killed earlier. Blood suddenly burst from its eyes and it whined
pitifully.
“Do something, please,” Beth
said, feeling sorry for the animal.
Rick went over and it tried
to crawl away, having long ago learned not to trust people. Rick wanted to pet
it, soothe it, but he didn’t know what kind of sickness it may have so he moved
behind it and drove his knife into its skull. He wiped the blade on the grass
before sheathing it and then continuing on with Beth.
“I don’t know what’s going on
with these animals but I have a feeling it’s going to be bad news,” he said.
Beth silently agreed before taking Rick’s hand and continuing the walk home.
…
Rick walked Beth back to her cell where she
gathered things to take to the wash. He lingered in the doorway to watch her,
thinking how happy he was to be with her, and wondering when it would be the
right time to tell Carl.
His son really was the only thing that held him back from
coming out in the open about his relationship with Beth. He didn’t want to do
anything that would cause a rift between himself and his son but at the same
time he wanted to be open. He hated the sneaking around. It made it feel like
he was doing something wrong even though he didn’t feel like he was. Not
anymore.
Time, Rick thought, was what Carl needed. He needed time to
come to terms with Lori’s death and the idea that his father was only human.
“Something wrong?” Beth asked, looking up at him.
“I…”
She waited. Her face was the perfect expression of
curiosity and patience.
“What?”
“I want us to be open. I don’t like hiding what we have.
Don’t ever think I’m ashamed of us.”
She kissed him lightly on the lips and went back to sorting
clothes. “I know you’re not ashamed of us. I’m not either. You’ll know when the
time is right to tell Carl.”
“Are you a mind-reader?”
“Nope. I’ve just really gotten to know you.”
“Hey,” Daryl said, appearing at the door. “We got a
situation. I found a few people on the side of the road not far from here, hurt
when their car flipped over. Hershel needs some pain meds and other stuff that
he’s gonna run out of before morning. Michonne just left to look for the
Governor and everybody’s busy. You up for a run? I need backup I can trust.”
He was asking Beth directly, not asking Rick for permission
or to make the decision for her, something Rick and Beth both respected and
appreciated. Plus, the fact that he trusted Beth over older people he could
ask, including Rick, pleased Beth. She threw her clothes aside and grabbed her
machete.
“I’m good to go.”
“We’re taking the bike.”
Rick kissed Beth long and deep. “Be careful.”
“Of course I will.”
…
Rick hadn’t had a bad feeling about Beth leaving but
when the sun started to set and then hours passed beyond that he was pacing the
corridor outside his cell, seriously considering going out after Daryl and
Beth, should something turn out to be wrong. As though reading his mind Hershel
came for a visit.
“There’s a reason we don’t go out after dark,” Hershel
said. “Can’t see anything.”
“I’d say this qualifies as an emergency,” Rick says. “We
leave after dark for emergencies.”
“Daryl is a capable man and Beth isn’t defenseless,” Hershel
pointed out. “If they’re not back by noon tomorrow go after them then.”
“If they’re not back by ten I’m going,” Rick said.
Hershel nodded his agreement and then left. He looked as
worried as Rick felt, more so, but he was right. It wouldn’t do any good to go
out looking after dark. Beth and Daryl were probably holed up somewhere for the
night, following the rules, and were perfectly fine.
“It’s Beth, isn’t it?”
Rick hadn’t realized Carl had come to his cell and was
watching him from the corridor.
“What?”
“The new woman you’re dating. It’s Beth, isn’t it?”
Carl’s voice was as unreadable as his face. Rick seriously
considered lying but he knew that would cause more harm than good.
“How did you figure it out?” Rick asked, confirming Carl’s
suspicions.
“It explains Maggie and Glenn being weird with you for so
long. You hang around with her more than usual. I put it together.”
Rick patted the bed next to him but Carl decided to remain
in the doorway.
“How do you feel about it?”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. She’s not much older than me.”
“That’s true.”
“Am I supposed to call her Mom and let her boss me around?”
Rick smiled at that. “No. You don’t have to do that. You
don’t even have to like it but someday you’ll have to accept it.”
“I accept it. I just don’t really like it.”
“I understand that. I can’t say I blame you.”
They stared at one another for a few moments. Rick was
relieved to have it out in the open, to have this talk with his son, even if it
led down a path he wouldn’t like.
“Do you love her?”
“Yes,” Rick said. “I still love Lori, too. I haven’t
forgotten her, Carl. I’ll never forget her.”
Carl’s shoulders seemed to sag. His body seemed to deflate
as though he was relieved. He’d obviously had doubts.
“Hershel said something like that.”
“You talked to Hershel?”
“Yeah. He wouldn’t tell me who it was but he said you’d
always love Mom.”
“He’s right. I always will.”
“Just do me a favor? Don’t be all kissy and touchy with her
in front of me. Not for awhile.”
“I can do that,” Rick agreed with a nod. “I love you too,
son. More than Beth, more than Lori, more than anyone except Judith. I love you
both the same. There’s nobody I’d ever put before you.”
Carl nodded, looking a little less burdened. “She’ll be
back tomorrow. I know it. Daryl won’t let anything happen to her.”
He left then, leaving Rick alone with his thoughts and his
fears. He lay on the bunk and after a long time hoping to hear they’d returned
he drifted into sleep filled with nightmares. He finally had something good.
How long until Fate ripped it all away from him?
…
Rick awoke to Beth’s hands gently rubbing his back. He
pulled her close, filled with relief so intense he could have wept from it.
“What happened?”
“We got pinned down by a group of walkers. WE ended up
spending the night in an old house until they forgot about us and wandered off.
We got what Daddy needed but I lost my machete in the fight.”
She looked genuinely upset about the machete. She’d been
stranded away from home overnight and her biggest complaint had been to lose
her weapon. He wanted to insist she never go on a run again but he wouldn’t
dare. She needed the experience should she ever find herself out on her own
trying to survive.
“I’m glad you’re home safe. Look, I have something to tell
you.”
“Carl?” she asked, nodding. He knows about us. He and I
already talked. He made sure I knew I wasn’t replacing Lori. He’s trying to be
okay with it but I don’t think he is. Not really. Not yet.”
Rick nodded his agreement. Just because Carl hadn’t thrown
a fit didn’t mean he was cool with his father dating a girl not even old enough
to be his mother, and a girl he’d once had a crush on himself.
“We’ll have to be patient and give him time. He’ll come
around.”
Beth put her hand on his thigh and squeezed. He knew what
she had in mind and he was thinking along the same lines. “Let’s sneak off to
the library before everybody gets up and gets going. I need you.”
“Let’s go,” he said, getting up to follow after her.
“Just one thing,” she said, as they all but ran toward the
library, their bodies aching with the desire to join together. “If you ever
come across a walker with a red machete stuck through its shoulder, it’s mine.”
Rick grinned. “I’ll get it and bring it right back to you.
I promise.”
…
Rick had no idea
that when
he and Beth made love in the library it would be their last time.
One tragedy after another struck within the space of just a
few days that kept them too busy to make time for intimacy. Beth’s would-be
suitor, Zach, was killed on a run. Twelve people died in a walker attack from a
good boy who’d died and turned from a sickness. Two more of their people had
been murdered in cold blood in Carol’s futile attempt to stop the sickness from
spreading. Their people went on a medicine run that Rick was afraid they’d
never return from. He banished Carol and came home to almost lose the prison to
a walker herd.
Now, rick was picking himself up off the ground, wondering
where his children were, where Beth was. Hershel was dead. The prison had
fallen. His people needed him.
Beth needed him.
Rick faced it all, feeling his heart break once again. His
home was gone, taken over by the dead. His daughter was dead, consumed by
walkers as her mother had been. He was barely on his feet. Beth was nowhere in
sight. Fate had apparently been affronted by his audacity to dare seek
happiness, to want too much from this hell they called life, and had once again
used a firm hand to put him in his place.
So Rick fled with his son, wondering if he could survive
his own wounds. His only advice, the only thing he had to give his son as he
limped along, his body weak and hurting, was not to look back. Just don’t look
back.
…
They were on the way to Terminus when he saw
it. They’d had to detour, looking for food, and that was when it stumbled
across his, Carl’s, and Michonne’s path. A walker with a machete stuck in its
shoulder. Rick could hear Beth’s voice just as plain as day when she’d told him
that if he saw such a thing, it was hers.
“That’s Beth’s machete,” Rick said.
“How do you know?” asked Carl.
“She lost it on that run with Daryl. She said if I saw it,
it belonged to her.”
Neither Michonne nor Carl attempted to stop Rick as he
moved in on the walker. He yanked the machete out of its shoulder and then used
it to finish the kill Beth had started.
“Thanks for bringing it back,” he whispered, cleaning the
blade on the dead things jeans, feeling a little crazy.
Holding the machete, seeing the B.G. carved into the handle
in Beth’s writing, made him feel as though he was touching her again. He felt
close to her for the first time in weeks. He stood there, holding it, hoping to
God he found her alive and well.
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